The ghost of fear of making mistakes

Making mistakes when learning a new language is the most common fear among most students. And many times, accompanied by shame, it causes people to become paralyzed and prefer to be silent rather than participate.

A thousand times we have heard the phrases “we learn from mistakes“, “we all make mistakes“, “to err is human“, “if you don’t make mistakes is because you don’t do anything“, etc. Phrases that we understand perfectly, and that we can even agree with 100%, but… when it comes to having to speak in another language, it is not so easy for us. And the truth is, no one likes to be wrong. When we make a mistake when speaking a foreign language we can feel uncomfortable, frustrated, ridiculous, and sometimes even a little silly.

Many times I hear my students say “in my head I think the sentence well and then when I say it, I do it wrong”. And of course, I understand that it is frustrating to think correctly and speak in the opposite way because it happens to me too.

It has helped me a lot in my profession, but also in my personal life, the arrival in my hands of the book “Laugh and learn” by Doni Tamblym, where she proposes 95 techniques to use humor in training and explains how to manage mistakes in a very clever way: “Cognitive research shows that humor promotes listening, critical thinking, creativity, learning and memory.”

Of course my Spanish lessons are not a theatrical comedy. And obviously I never lose focus on what my main objective is: that my students learn Spanish based on their personal objectives and rhythms. So… What does the fear of error have to do with humor? Well, I think a lot. Because in my experience, embracing mistakes through humor has given my students excellent results.

I think i’is important that we can de-dramatize the error, understand that it is part of the learning process and that it is not serious to make mistakes. On the contrary, it’s necessary. Just as it’s necessary for a child to fall many times when he learns to walk. When we learn to walk we fall, we take hold of furniture or people to support us, we calculate before moving, sometimes we take several quick steps, sometimes just one but firm and sure. This is how I see the learning process. And sometimes I meet students who want to run before knowing how to walk, and others who don’t even dare to stand up, others who put pressure on themselves because they believe that since they have heard an explanation many times they must have internalized the concept… In short, there are many factors that intervene in the learning process, perhaps I will write about them later.

That’s why I invite you to “make friend” your mistakes, to see them as necessary tools to improve, as valuable material to grow. They are allies, but beware, momentary allies, whom we have to conscientiously consider and once overcome, let go with joy and gratitude.

I have lived in Italy for almost 20 years, and even today I still laugh at the mistakes I made at the beginning, at the things I said convinced that they were correct and when I found out what I was really saying.

Now I’m studying English and I keep trying to take my mistakes with responsible humor (which is not the same as saying “I make mistakes, haha, who cares!”) because I notice that I remember and I advance faster.

And you? How do you feel when you make mistakes? Tell me, I would love to know your experience.